HanHangover Manifesto

By

Jason Goldberg

Why is it that we go out to the bar about three times a week and drink so much that we end up in the toilet bowl. We all know that about 95% of all people who go to a bar on any given night are there to get shit-faced drunk. Hey its college and isn't that what college is all about… drinking, puking, girls. It's hard to say why we put ourselves through all of this when we know the next day is not going to be an enjoyable one. We leave the bar and get some pizza or hot dogs, which only makes things worse. Then we stumble home and somehow work our way into bed. Finally, our night really begins when everything begins to spin and you try to close your eyes but that doesn't help. Five minutes later your head is in your garbage can or toilet bowl. Fun isn't it. Aspirin companies thrive on college students getting hung over because they provide us with relief the next day. I think to myself do we need alcohol to have fun and the answer is no, you do not need alcohol to have fun. Then why are we doing this to ourselves? It feels good to be drunk because for a lot of people it makes them loosen up and they let their hair loose and party hard as well as providing them with the ability to act stupid. It is fun to act stupid once in a while. I guess a hangover is worth it for a night of fun. Isn't that what we are supposed to do? Study, nah. Party, yeah. Life should be lived out to it fullest and nobody should hold anything back cause you never know how short it will be, so as the Beer God says " The Beer God Has Spoken," so party on.